From owner-freebsd-chat Fri Dec 7 17: 6:44 2001 Delivered-To: freebsd-chat@freebsd.org Received: from avocet.prod.itd.earthlink.net (avocet.mail.pas.earthlink.net [207.217.120.50]) by hub.freebsd.org (Postfix) with ESMTP id F056737B416 for ; Fri, 7 Dec 2001 17:06:40 -0800 (PST) Received: from dialup-209.245.131.254.dial1.sanjose1.level3.net ([209.245.131.254] helo=blossom.cjclark.org) by avocet.prod.itd.earthlink.net with esmtp (Exim 3.33 #1) id 16CVwo-00015l-00 for freebsd-chat@freebsd.org; Fri, 07 Dec 2001 17:06:35 -0800 Received: (from cjc@localhost) by blossom.cjclark.org (8.11.6/8.11.3) id fB816WH20610 for freebsd-chat@freebsd.org; Fri, 7 Dec 2001 17:06:32 -0800 (PST) (envelope-from cjc) Date: Fri, 7 Dec 2001 17:06:28 -0800 From: "Crist J . Clark" To: freebsd-chat@freebsd.org Subject: Fw: Klingon Programmers Message-ID: <20011207170628.U8975@blossom.cjclark.org> Reply-To: cjclark@alum.mit.edu Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Disposition: inline User-Agent: Mutt/1.2.5i X-URL: http://people.freebsd.org/~cjc/ Sender: owner-freebsd-chat@FreeBSD.ORG Precedence: bulk List-ID: List-Archive: (Web Archive) List-Help: (List Instructions) List-Subscribe: List-Unsubscribe: X-Loop: FreeBSD.org Thought this was worth a chuckle. ----- Forwarded message from Riaan Klopper ----- From: Riaan Klopper To: dc-stuff@dis.org Subject: Klingon Programmers Date: Fri, 7 Dec 2001 11:09:10 +0200 X-Copyright: This message is Copyright all rights reserved unless expressly limited Restrict: no-external-archive Top 12 things likely to be overheard if you had a Klingon Programmer: 12) "Specifications are for the weak and timid!" 11) "This machine is a piece of GAGH! I need dual Pentium processors if I am to do battle with this code!" 10) "You cannot really appreciate Dilbert unless you've read it in the original Klingon." 9) "Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your skull!" 8) "What is this talk of 'release'? Klingons do not make software 'releases'. Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of designers and quality assurance people in its wake." 7) "Klingon function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have 'arguments' - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM." 6) "Debugging? Klingons do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak." 5) "I have challenged the entire quality assurance team to a Bat-Leth contest. They will not concern us again." 4) "A TRUE Klingon Warrior does not comment his code!" 3) "By filing this bug report you have challenged the honor of my family. Prepare to die!" 2) "You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you stand!" 1) "Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it! Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!" ********************************************************************* NOTICE - This message contains privileged and confidential information intended only for the use of the addressee named above. If you are not the intended recipient of this message, you are hereby notified that you must not disseminate, copy or take any action in reliance on it. If you have received this message in error, please notify Investec Group, its subsidiaries or associates, immediately. Any views expressed in this message are those of the individual sender, except where the sender specifically states them to be the view of Investec Group, its subsidiaries or associates. ********************************************************************** ----- End forwarded message ----- -- "It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's hilarious." Crist J. Clark | cjclark@alum.mit.edu | cjclark@jhu.edu http://people.freebsd.org/~cjc/ | cjc@freebsd.org To Unsubscribe: send mail to majordomo@FreeBSD.org with "unsubscribe freebsd-chat" in the body of the message