From owner-freebsd-doc Fri Oct 12 6:35:55 2001 Delivered-To: freebsd-doc@freebsd.org Received: from nef.ens.fr (nef.ens.fr [129.199.96.32]) by hub.freebsd.org (Postfix) with ESMTP id 4A27137B407; Fri, 12 Oct 2001 06:35:49 -0700 (PDT) Received: from corto.lpt.ens.fr (corto.lpt.ens.fr [129.199.122.2]) by nef.ens.fr (8.10.1/1.01.28121999) with ESMTP id f9CDZhN79481 ; Fri, 12 Oct 2001 15:35:43 +0200 (CEST) Received: from (rsidd@localhost) by corto.lpt.ens.fr (8.9.3/jtpda-5.3.1) id PAA83737 ; Fri, 12 Oct 2001 15:35:42 +0200 (CEST) Date: Fri, 12 Oct 2001 15:35:42 +0200 From: Rahul Siddharthan To: Tom Hukins Cc: Jean-Francois Dockes , freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.ORG Subject: Re: Updated 'diskless operation' section for the handbook Message-ID: <20011012153542.A77622@lpt.ens.fr> References: <200110121003.f9CA37p10022@hautmedoc.dockes.com> <20011012124351.A7169@eborcom.com> Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Disposition: inline User-Agent: Mutt/1.2.5i In-Reply-To: <20011012124351.A7169@eborcom.com>; from tom@FreeBSD.ORG on Fri, Oct 12, 2001 at 12:43:51PM +0100 X-Operating-System: FreeBSD 3.4-STABLE i386 Sender: owner-freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.ORG Precedence: bulk List-ID: List-Archive: (Web Archive) List-Help: (List Instructions) List-Subscribe: List-Unsubscribe: X-Loop: FreeBSD.org Maybe none of my business, but: Tom Hukins said on Oct 12, 2001 at 12:43:51: > > The attached patch contains fixes for some of the English, a minor > stylistic change (linking directly to a man page) and a few examples > of removing unecessary space within tags. I don't see the point of *any* of the "English" changes; the original language was correct, as far as I can see, and the new language does not seem improved. In some cases it's not worse, just unnecessary, but in the following cases I have to disagree strongly; one of the changes definitely goes against common usage in FreeBSD too. > @@ -1109,8 +1109,8 @@ > > A FreeBSD machine can boot over the network and operate without a > local disk, using file systems mounted from an NFS server. No system > - modification is necessary, beyond standard configuration files. > - Such a system is easy to set up because all the necessary elements > + modification is necessary, beyond standard configuration files, and > + such a system is easy to set up because all the necessary elements > are readily available: The change here seems to go against a common rule of clear writing: use short sentences. I don't see why two short sentences should be combined into one long one. > @@ -1156,15 +1156,15 @@ > There are many ways to set up diskless workstations. Many > elements are involved, and most can be customized to suit local > taste. The following will describe the setup of a complete system, > - emphasising simplicity and compatibility with the > + with an emphasis on simplicity and compatibility with the > standard FreeBSD startup scripts. The system described has the > following characteristics: Again, this just adds three more words, and I don't see why. > > > The diskless workstations use a shared > - read-only root filesystem, and a shared > - read-only /usr. > + readonly root filesystem, and a shared > + readonly /usr. To me, "read-only" seems correct; it is also consistent with actual FreeBSD usage (the output of the "mount" command, for example). I don't think there is such a word as "readonly". > @@ -1222,8 +1222,8 @@ > The isc-dhcp server can answer > both BOOTP and DHCP requests. > > - As of release 4.4, isc-dhcp is not part of the base > - system. You will first need to install the > + isc-dhcp is not part of the base > + system (as of release 4.4). You will first need to install the > /usr/ports/net/isc-dhcp3 port or the > corresponding package. Please refer to > for general information about ports and packages. Again, to me the original looks definitely better. > @@ -1558,7 +1559,7 @@ > > > > - Running with a read-only <filename>/usr</filename> + Running with a readonly <filename>/usr</filename>