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Date:      Tue, 6 Nov 2001 17:38:04 -0500
From:      David Friedman <driz@away.net>
To:        jobs@freebsd.org
Subject:   FreeBSD work in Massachusetts
Message-ID:  <20011106173804.A55494@mail>

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David Friedman is a seasoned professional who realises that every
company has a lot to offer.  If you feel that you have what it
takes, please respond to this email with your contact information.
Every inquiry is read thoroughly, and you will be contacted if it's
deemed that you meet David's requirements.  Otherwise, you can rest
assured that your application will be filed into an electronic desk
drawer for an unspecified amount of time, where it will be referenced
periodically in the event of a future opening.


Position Title:  David Friedman's Employer


Summary:  
Provide day to day support of David Friedman's checking account.
Will be responsible for placating each of David's 14 personalities,
as well as aiding him in an ongoing quest to maintain his current 
status of "UNIX God", which has been demonstrated by a series of 
diverse implementations of David's inate abilities.


Responsibilities:
The successful candidate will be able to schedule around David's
part-time position at a Massachusetts-based brothel, which will
remain anonymous for legal reasons.  Other tasks include, but are
not limited to the following:

* Providing David with a clean place to work.
* Expecting David to show up every day, and pretending to enjoy
  his presence.
* Challenging David with any number of complex tasks involving
  FreeBSD, Technical Support, Network Engineering, and anything
  else that he can read about at groups.google.com or Barnes &
  Noble.
* Paying David at regular intervals.+


Qualifications:
* Proven track record of not being a recruiting agency.
* Must be willing to omit RTF and HTML from emails to David.
* Ability to not mind seeing David's "pretty" face, both
  on a daily and on-call basis.
* Experience with mouthy and emotionally distressed employees
  a must.
* Ability to maintain an aura of sense and cognitive thought in
  your dealings with employees, treat them like people, and provide
  them with adequate bathroom facilities are all musts.
* Working knowledge of the term "/.".
* Working knowledge of the term or symbol that once represented the 
  artist who was, at the time, formerly known as Prince.
* Exposure to poor, boredom-induced humor a plus.

+Payment is expected as services are rendured, unless prior
arrangements have been made.


David Friedman is an equal opportunity employee with 5 years of
experience in Technical Support, System Administration, and Network
Administration, and is skilled in the following areas:  FreeBSD, 
Solaris/SunOS, Linux, AIX, Digital UNIX/Tru64 UNIX, HP-UX, SCO, TCP/IP, 
DNS, NFS, HTML, NTP, SMB, SMTP, POP3, EGRP, EDRP, LMNOP, ABCDEFG, JKL;,
Windows (3.x[x]/9x/NT/2000), DHCP, DUN, and QWERTY.

Please go to http://www.driz.org/resume/ for a complete description.

Finally, I recently saw a job post on monster.com for a Help Desk
position that required "4 years of experience with DHCP".  I didn't apply
for it, since I clearly don't possess the ominous skills obtained by
studying RFC 2131 for 4 years, but perhaps there is a "dhcp master" among
us who can shed some light on the subject?

Thanks.
-- 
David Friedman - http://www.away.net/

Windows: "Where do you want to go today?" 
Linux: "Where do you want to go tomorrow?"
BSD: "Are you guys coming or what?"

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